Directing and writing credits:
"An Affair to Remember" is directed by Matthew Diamond, written by Amy Sherman-Palladino. This is Diamond's second episode of Season 4. He also directed "The Hobbit, The Sofa, and Digger Stiles," the episode where Sookie serves gravlax to ten-year-olds.
The only ASP news I have is that the Producers Guild of America is awarding her the Norman Lear Achievement Award in Television this month. According to Variety, this is what Gail Berman and Lucy Fisher (PGA presidents) said about her:
“Amy Sherman-Palladino is everything you want a TV producer to be. She’s smart, she’s tenacious, she knows the story she wants to tell and how to put together the right team to tell it. Her characters and stories may span different eras, but her sensibility is unique and unmistakable. Watch any episode from one of her series for just five minutes, and you’ll instantly understand why she’s built such a wide and passionate following.”
I'm happy to see ASP finally receive some well-deserved credit for her work after years of "GG" Emmy snubs. Despite what my snark might lead you to believe, I have major respect for her and have no idea how she and Dan wrote 15-16 episodes of this show every season without losing their damn minds.
Most batshit crazy outfit:
You might think that Lorelai's Juicy Couture sweatpants (which she wears in public!) are the clear winner, but oh, no ... I hate this outfit even more.
Compared to her usual garbage, it's not even that ugly. The colors are bright, the sleeves are fine, and the fit seems okay. What I don't understand is the scarf. What is its purpose? It's weirdly long for a gauzy fashion scarf and wildly impractical for dinner. With one false move, she's dangling that baby directly into her food. I want to take a pair of scissors and snip it to an appropriate length.
I hate to single out Sookie since she's supposed to be pregnant, but I wouldn't be doing my job if I neglected to mention this monstrosity:
The costumers love to make Sookie look ugly, but this crime against boobs is exceptional.
Most irritating Rory or Lorelai moment:
Rory spends the entire episode stomping around, whining about how there are no good places to study at Yale. Welcome to the real world, jackass. If you're distracted on a quiet campus, how the hell are you going to deal with the beloved open office spaces of the 2010s? Buy yourself a pair of noise cancelling headphones and prepare for a lifetime of unavoidable distraction.
Number of times Rory or Lorelai treat their bff like shit:
Lorelai, who is apparently in no need of extra money, treats Sookie like she's a moron for accepting a job from Emily Gilmore. Not everyone has a secret trust fund and can afford to turn down work just because they dislike the client. Emily is mild in comparison to some people that I'm forced to interact with on a daily basis. Sure, she's tough, but she's professional and pays well. I would happily deal with her soup demands and candle preferences in exchange for a fat check.
Best literary or pop culture references:
If Luke is supposed to be some kind of noob who never watches movies, stop writing him lines like this:
Kirk: I was doing my Jon Cryer from "Pretty in Pink" impression.
Luke: Duckie?
Kirk: Yes, Duckie.
Luke: Were you near the end of the movie yet?
Kirk: No, just getting to the "Try a Little Tenderness" moment.
Luke: You've got plenty of ammo left. Go on. Go back over there.
Luke has never seen "Diner" or "Casablanca," but is intimately familiar with a Molly Ringwald movie? Give me a break.
Stars Hollow weirdness:
Kirk prepares for his date with Lulu (Rini Bell) in the cutest, most eccentric way possible. He asks Lorelai for fashion advice, pays Luke off for the best table in the house, brings champagne and flowers, and tapes himself on test-runs so that he can revise his strategy accordingly. I probably don't mention it enough, but I fucking love Kirk. Despite the fact that he creepily inquires about the price of Luke's apartment for post-date sex (and asks an old woman if meatloaf makes her horny), he treats Lulu like a total gentleman. He even asks for help gauging her interest when the big day comes to make sure he isn't misreading the signs.
Kudos to Kirk. May his politician mailbox business grow and prosper! I'll take one Condoleeza Rice, please (to use as fireplace kindling, natch).
Sharpest insult or one-liner:
After the test meal with Emily, Lorelai storms into the diner and shouts her order: "[a] cheeseburger, onion rings, and a list of people who killed their parents and got away with it. I'm looking for heroes." This is one of my favorite lines of the show and Lauren Graham kills the delivery.
Books mentioned/books Rory is reading:
Rory cracks open a book during her first tree study sesh, but I can't tell what it is. I assume it's something for her philosophy class.
Best song of the episode:
E6 is one of those bizarre ones without music. Did Helen Pai go on sabbatical?
Thoughts:
Nothing of consequence happens in this episode. Rory whines about how "difficult" her life is, Lorelai treats her mother like satan, and Kirk goes on a smashingly successful date with Lulu. There are good little moments throughout but it's "meh" as a whole. We'll start with Rory's storyline since it's quick and easy to vilify.
In philosophy class, Rory finds out that she has to fit two weeks worth of reading into one week. Professor Bell is kind of like, "I don't feel bad for you; deal with it," and the entire class groans. Kudos to Bell for forcing these assholes to learn life lessons early. If I had a nickel for every time someone at work gave me a deadline at the last minute, I'd be able to retire early. Do you ever wonder why I don't update this blog more? It's because I'm so exhausted after dealing with everyone's bullshit all day that I don't have the time/energy.
When Rory heads back to the dorm and attempts to study, she quickly realizes that there are too many distractions. Janet is jogging on a tiny, squeaky trampoline; Paris is fighting with Jamie; Tana is watching CNN. In other words, everyone is too loud/annoying and the sole reason why Rory can't focus 😒 Last episode, she told Paris to get earplugs so that she wouldn't hear Janet's alarm in the morning. Does she not recognize the hypocrisy? Three other people live in Rory's dorm suite and there's no reason why they should accommodate her needs at the expense of their own, especially when she asks in the most passive aggressive way possible. Her interaction with Tana gave me flashbacks to my horrible ex-roommate:
Rory: Tana, I'm trying to study.
Tana: Okay.
Rory: I can hear the TV through the wall.
Tana: Okay.
Rory: It's distracting.
Tana: Are you telling me to turn it off?
Rory: I'm not telling -
Tana: You can, you know, because your grandma paid for the TV.
Rory: I'm not telling you to turn the TV off.
Tana: Because you can.
Rory: The TV belongs to all of us.
Tana: If it's a matter of volume, I could press my ear to the speaker and then I could turn it really low.
Rory: Never mind.
Well then what the fuck do you want, Rory? Communicate clearly and directly for once in your life. Tana is desperately trying to work with you, but she's not a goddamn mind reader.
After this minor study setback, Rory comes home, expecting to use her room for a few hours. When she sees that it's unavailable (aka covered in broccoli tarts), she pitches a fit and storms back to campus. Sometimes it's nice to see Rory act like an insolent teenager, it's just a shame that the behavior is always coupled with a sizable dose of privilege.
Back on campus, she heads outside and stumbles upon the perfect "study tree." After getting shit done and bragging to Lorelai about it, she returns the next day for round two. Unfortunately, some dude beat her to the spot and is engrossed in the latest issue of Trucker's Monthly. Rory tries to tell him that the tree belongs to her, then shames him for his choice of reading material. Thankfully, he tells her to fuck off and doesn't cave to her petty manipulations. You can't own a tree on a public campus, you entitled brat.
While Lorelai was moderately sympathetic to her initial complaints, she loses her patience during the second wave. She says,
"You're in college now, Rory. If your study plan doesn't work, then come up with another one. Just figure it out, but stop complaining because you're not two."
Good for Lorelai. It's rare for her to tell Rory to stfu and act like an adult instead of encouraging her awful, selfish behavior. Thanks to her mom's advice, Rory formulates a new plan, one that we'll see executed multiple times over the course of the series: if there's a problem, throw some money at it. When Rory heads back to the tree, she bribes Mr. Trucking Magazine with a crisp Andrew Jackson. I hope she regularly thanks her rich grandparents for their assistance because without them/their money, she would instantly crumble.
Like Rory, Lorelai spends most of the episode dealing with rich people problems. Emily Gilmore wants to hire Sookie to cater Jason and Richard's launch party and is shocked to hear that she and Lorelai have a company together (the Independence Catering Company). It's always the same old story with Emily and Lorelai:
- Lorelai fails to tell Emily something about her life.
- Emily is angry when she hears Lorelai's news from a third party.
- Emily confronts Lorelai.
- Lorelai responds with irritation, hostility, or lies instead of trying to understand Emily's feelings.
In this case, Lorelai lies, Emily calls her on her bullshit, and when she refuses to tell the truth, retaliates by making her and Sookie stage a test meal before the event.
Sookie goes all out and prepares the following for Emily's assessment: roasted asparagus with parmesan cheese, a trio of winter soups (tomato basil, butternut squash, Catalonian garlic), and lobster pot pie. After some deliberation, Emily announces that she is pleased and a job offer is extended. Based on the menu, I guess she decided not to go with a Russian theme.
It's a shame that the party doesn't happen because Sookie really had her heart set on a minivan for little Davey (gross). When Emily asks Jason for his party guest list, he informs her that cocktail parties are for old people. He wants to take all of the company's clients, who I imagine are exact replicas of Donald Trump, to Atlantic City for hookers and cocaine. I hate to side with Jason, but his idea is good. Old White men love tacky debauchery significantly more than perfect floral arrangements and expensive bone china.
When Richard decides to run with Jason's idea, Emily is dejected. Her party planning responsibilities are rescinded, and she's basically told to her face that she's obsolete. After Emily fires her, Lorelai is initially angry but quickly becomes concerned when she receives zero pushback. Emily even apologizes and admits wrongdoing! Of course, that asshole Digger is behind all of this. As soon as Lorelai figures out what's going on, she throws a denim jacket over her Juicy Couture sweatpants, storms into Jason's office, and tells him how she feels.
He refuses to apologize, tells her he doesn't understand why she cares about her mother's feelings or opinion, and asks her out repeatedly. Lorelai, satan help us, is totally into this sleazy behavior. She pretends to be disgusted but it's obvious that Jason has successfully charmed her. These two will be having weird, overly verbal sex in no time!
Random observations:
- The elder Gilmores are upset because their neighbors are making them look bad by handing out king-size candy bars at Halloween. Give me a fucking break.
- Jason's patchy pube beard is unacceptable. What's even worse is the self-aggrandizing moment where Jason and Richard lavish in "important men doing important things." These two need to get their boners out of each other's mouths.
- One of my favorite Kirk salesman lines is "whimsy goes with everything." He just gets it.
- This episode also contains another beloved line: "I mean, it's all any of us wants - to find a nice person to hang out with 'til we drop dead. Not a lot to ask." Amen.
- Hillary is not too old to enjoy it, but she never will enjoy it because our country is comprised of misogynistic fuckwits who enjoy voting against their own self-interests.
- Aris Alvarado, aka the real Caesar, is here to stay, even though he fucks up a tuna melt by forgetting the tuna.
- Sookie compares the Gilmore estate to "Citizen Kane's house." She's not wrong.
- Jason calls Lorelai umlauts because of the time he knocked her canoe over at summer camp when she wasn't wearing a bra. I wonder if this camp was anything like the Steiner Mountain Resort.
- According to Digger, waltzing is "embarrassing and a little gay." Never forget that this show took place in the early 2000s.